Miss Manners: Ungrateful bride begs for gifts
By Judith Martin
Updated: April 22, 2010
Dear Miss Manners: A friend from work had a “destination” wedding in Las Vegas. Because of the cost of traveling to another state, hotel stay and the fact that it was the week before Christmas, I declined on my RSVP well in advance.
My friend was upset that I was unable to attend her out-of-state affair. However, I made the bride’s veil, and she said she loved it. I received a note of thanks for the veil from my friend. She stated in the thank you note that she “appreciated her true friends that made the commitment to come to the wedding” and that “we are still accepting monetary gifts for our honeymoon cruise later this summer.”
Beyond the initial thank you, I feel that both statements were inappropriate. Her wedding veil was costly to create, and since it was my gift to her, I do not feel inclined to give a cash gift for their honeymoon. Isn’t the honeymoon their responsibility?
Am I wrong? Should I rethink giving her money for her cruise?
Gentle Reader: It depends. Don’t you want to save up to buy them a house? And to furnish it? And to contribute to their future children’s education? Because that is what you would be in for if you decided to pay bills for a pair of greedy ingrates.
Miss Manners cannot think of a more generous and charming present than the one you lovingly made. But evidently, the bride can.